Police – @#$!#@$. You make me want to quit. Amazing.
Tony Bennet. Best Duo – Grab Stevie’s hand dude!!! He’s blind!!!
DixieChicks – I don’t care if you’re ready to make nice or not. Because you were rockin’ the Tele. Rock ‘On.
Prince – One Word, Chest Hair. OK. Two.
Beyonce – Two Words – Jennifer Hudson.
Prince – Bad idea to stand behind Mary J.
Justin – PIMP
Beyonce – Two Words. Mary J.
John Legend, Corinne Bailey – You need to thank the Lord for John Mayer, he saved you.
Shakira – I had to change the channel. No married man could watch that and… well…oh my.
Dixie Chicks – Song of the Year. Wow. Way to say screw you to America with one award.
Gnarles Barkley – I want those teeth.
Ludacris – Best Rap Album – Keep rockin’ the Dirty South. ATL. That fade is TIGHT!!! Woah!!! Oprah and Bill O’Riley? WTF?
Mary J. – I think I just rededicated my life. That was the best performance of the night. Beyonce who?
Dixie Chicks – Country Album of the Year – I love it. From Outcasts to Grammy Sweepers.
Carrie and Rascall – Carrie, I fast forwarded you. Rascall, who says a front man cant be a chunker? Own it G.
Carrie Underwood – Why does she bore me?
The Grammy’s – What’s up with the history lesson all night?
Smokey Robinson – Did He Really Just Say “Outside I’m Masturbating?” Please tell me no.
Lionel Ritchie – Hello? Yea baby.
Chris Brown – Dude. It’s been a while since a black guy actually danced better than Timberlake. Well done.
Christina – You did good. But Mary J still wins.
Chris Brown – You just did James Brown PROUD. No words. Just danced.
James Blunt – G C Em D. Work it. A good song can sit on it’s own.
Justin’s new girly singer – Rigged.
Dixie Chicks – Record of the Year – One…Two…Three…”Screw You Country Radio Stations!!!”
Chili Peppers – Same Old Junk. ZZZZzzzzz –
Al Gore – SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dixie Chicks – 5 of 5. Count’Em
Anyone with me?